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Bamboozledandsad
Post  Post subject: I hate that I am sad, when I know that leaving is right.  |  Posted: Tue May 23, 2017 8:59 pm
Nursery

Joined: Tue May 23, 2017 8:13 pm
Posts: 2
Location: Northern California

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:sick: I have just figured it out ... I've been completely bamboozled and I can't even believe that I fell for this... the worst part? I am so sad. I get annoyed, scared, sad and feel like I am a horrible person about a thousand times a day. The people in my church were EVERYTHING to me. I'm a new member (3 years) and am resigning from the church. It's such a long and involved story that I couldn't possibly explain it in this little box. Be certain that my story involves Bishops and RS Presidents telling lies, being so dishonest that I was sure if I didn't say something I would answer to HF for not taking a stand. I had friends (members) who became my family (who also allowed me to sleep in the streets) when I asked for help to NOT become homeless. I found myself homeless and no one tried to help ... until I met a kind stranger. I am not homeless now. I have been brow beaten, yelled at, humiliated, lied to and ignored. The church is not true. I am ready to resign. I may be a new member but my life is in a shambles because of the sacrifice required to be a member. Those people care nothing for anyone but themselves ... I am out. And I am embarrassed at how hard it is, emotionally, tomfinalize my resignation. I know they are nuts ... the Mormon Stare is enough to creep me out ... but the way that they seem to be tracking me? Creepy. I hope to learn that it's an easy out and I am just paranoid ... I feel like I have to dodge them all the time. How did I get here ?,[quote][/quote]

_________________
The greatest Church
is within you,
and it is made of love,
courage and conscience.


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Abinadi
Post  Post subject: Re: I hate that I am sad, when I know that leaving is right.  |  Posted: Tue May 23, 2017 10:34 pm
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Joined: Thu Mar 13, 2008 12:23 am
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Sorry you experienced all that **** stuff, Bamboozledandsad. If it helps, some of us here sure understand what you are feeling since we went through it, too. The frustration is almost insurmountable. "Be true to you." You were neither bad nor stupid, you were manipulated and doing what you thought was best. So don't beat yourself up. You are good, and now you have another tool to use - the ability to recognize false manipulation, at least some falsehood and some manipulative scoundrels. It's bound to get better from here!

_________________
"Prove it!" - Tarquinius Septem

"Everyone has to find his own path." - Ip-Man


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joseph's myth
Post  Post subject: I hate that I am sad, when I know that leaving is right.  |  Posted: Wed May 24, 2017 1:33 am
God of Poly-Folly

Joined: Wed Mar 12, 2008 2:29 pm
Posts: 5417

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Abinadi wrote:
Sorry you experienced all that **** stuff, Bamboozledandsad. If it helps, some of us here sure understand what you are feeling since we went through it, too. The frustration is almost insurmountable. "Be true to you." You were neither bad nor stupid, you were manipulated and doing what you thought was best. So don't beat yourself up. You are good, and now you have another tool to use - the ability to recognize false manipulation, at least some falsehood and some manipulative scoundrels. It's bound to get better from here!


Some never find out or can make the all important realization. I barely know what to say, it does hurt, it is sad and it is awful and terrible.

Then again, we are kind-of a little like maybe Guinea pigs in a strange strange way, subject to circumstances maybe not so easily duplicated anywhere else. You are an individual, each set of circumstances is different.

Then again, we have become similar, you are one of us.

I hope this helps at least a little bit.

Abinadi is such a sweet sweet soul to meet in person, you'll maybe rarely encounter such folks ever again in your lifetime, you are truly among giants in this way. I believe you have more than one giant in your future. Sometimes a grateful heart can more easily carry you to where you may need to be.

_________________
God of Poly-Folly Folly

{If you believe in things that you don't understand, then you suffer ~Stevie Wonder}
.................. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ekkkD8HU944
........................ http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ekkkD8HU944
.................. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ekkkD8HU944


God of Poly-Folly Folly


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productofchoice
Post  Post subject: Re: I hate that I am sad, when I know that leaving is right.  |  Posted: Wed May 24, 2017 1:39 pm
God

Joined: Wed Apr 06, 2011 12:49 pm
Posts: 2802
Location: NC

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Hi Bamboozledandsad,

It's a hard thing to leave because of what you're saying, that many friendships can be left there and people who you care about and care for just disappear.

If they can't be friends with you unless you are in their church, they aren't real friends.

They are in the category of a high school friend who you have never spoken to since high school.

Or the category of a coworker who left your company and well you just don't talk any more.

Or a neighbor that you saw daily and they moved and now you never see them or talk to them.

Little friendships stumble over that sort of thing. Big friendships overcome those things.

And in Mormonism, Fellowship (assigned friendship) takes the place of real friendship. People come over to your house and visit because they are assigned. People ask how you are doing because that's part of the script. People ask "Is there anything we can do?" because that's the way what they've learned. And somewhere in this muddy mess there is a blend of Friendship and fellowship and sometimes it takes a while to sort it out.

Peace

_________________
I resigned from the Church of THE Jesus Christ of the Latter Day Saints (Feb 2011)

"For nothing is secret, that shall not be made manifest; neither any thing hid, that shall not be known and come abroad." - Luke 8:17


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Melanie
Post  Post subject: Re: I hate that I am sad, when I know that leaving is right.  |  Posted: Wed May 24, 2017 4:27 pm
myself

Joined: Sat Jun 22, 2013 4:34 pm
Posts: 1693
Location: England

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Hey!

You are going to have experienced good things too and you can take all that was precious with you. You haven't lost any of that, the ways you have become stronger as well through these times. You haven't lost yourself. It can take time to work it all out, it is kind of like cycles, I have found, and with each cycle of understanding, more healing can come to you.

You have stood up for Christ. That is so wonderful. It doesn't make life easy but I would say you will never forget that and this will bring you strength. 1 Peter 3 13-22 including ''Keep your conscience clear so that when you are maligned those who abuse you for your good conduct in Christ may be put to shame.''

Emotionally resignation is very hard when it is all fresh and you haven't been inactive for ages beforehand, but, administratively, it is very easy and is no more than that, an administration process, so separate the emotion off from sending in the email to msr-confrec@ldschurch.org


To: Confidential Records: msr-confrec@ldschurch.org
Subject: Resignation of membership in LDS church

My full name is ______; my date of birth is ____________ . [I was baptized on ___(date). My membership number is ______.]
My residence address is _______ [in the ________ ward/branch].

I hereby resign my membership in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, effective immediately, and request you to remove my name permanently from your membership records. I wish no further contact from representatives of your church except to confirm that my name has been removed from your records. I expect to receive that confirmation within a reasonably short time.

You can be out in 2 to 6 weeks, and when you are resigned, it makes a huge difference and will stop any pestering that you may feel you are having.

It is an easy out. One lady on here a few months ago had her letter of name removal just 17 days after she sent the email in, so be encouraged.

It will take time to sort all the emotional issues out, but I believe you are doing stunningly well.

I am so glad you met a kind stranger. You have connectedness around you, just listen and watch out for it.

I am pleased to have met you and the board will be here for you. Take Care of yourself. Melanie

_________________
Why leave? http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=pl ... 989OOSOycw
How to heal? http://media.blubrry.com/mormonexpressi ... ion225.mp3


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joseph's myth
Post  Post subject: I hate that I am sad, when I know that leaving is right.  |  Posted: Thu May 25, 2017 12:03 am
God of Poly-Folly

Joined: Wed Mar 12, 2008 2:29 pm
Posts: 5417

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Hi Bamboozledandsad,

You doing alright? There is prayer and there is the power of God after Mormonism. I guess you just got caught-up in the fervor of people that for whatever reason needed to try and shame another fellow traveler for taking a careful look at the LDS (sm C) church.

So sorry that happened to you.

_________________
God of Poly-Folly Folly

{If you believe in things that you don't understand, then you suffer ~Stevie Wonder}
.................. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ekkkD8HU944
........................ http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ekkkD8HU944
.................. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ekkkD8HU944


God of Poly-Folly Folly


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Bamboozledandsad
Post  Post subject: Re: I hate that I am sad, when I know that leaving is right.  |  Posted: Thu May 25, 2017 12:06 pm
Nursery

Joined: Tue May 23, 2017 8:13 pm
Posts: 2
Location: Northern California

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It is really helpful and makes me feel so thankful for you, and all the responses I've gotten from my original post. It took me a while to let it sink in ... I still am trying to untangle the exact moment that I chose them - over the truth. Thank you so much ... it feels like I am atleast going to be able to navigate through this with others who know ... the being shunned and isolated was really working on my self esteem and ability to trust my gut . I know what is true ... and it's not that church - or the pervert JS.

Peace and love,
Marybeth

_________________
The greatest Church
is within you,
and it is made of love,
courage and conscience.


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joseph's myth
Post  Post subject: I hate that I am sad, when I know that leaving is right.  |  Posted: Fri May 26, 2017 1:25 am
God of Poly-Folly

Joined: Wed Mar 12, 2008 2:29 pm
Posts: 5417

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Bamboozledandsad wrote:
It is really helpful and makes me feel so thankful for you, and all the responses I've gotten from my original post. It took me a while to let it sink in ... I still am trying to untangle the exact moment that I chose them - over the truth. Thank you so much ... it feels like I am atleast going to be able to navigate through this with others who know ... the being shunned and isolated was really working on my self esteem and ability to trust my gut . I know what is true ... and it's not that church - or the pervert JS.

Peace and love,
Marybeth


Well Marybeth you are not alone. Chances are you never made a Miley Cyrus sex tape nor got roped in to make any HeLives.mormon.org videos either.

viewtopic.php?f=7&t=51743&sid=86b6218f9516a0f336a084b0c9a33346#p127585

See... Don't you feel better already?

_________________
God of Poly-Folly Folly

{If you believe in things that you don't understand, then you suffer ~Stevie Wonder}
.................. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ekkkD8HU944
........................ http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ekkkD8HU944
.................. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ekkkD8HU944


God of Poly-Folly Folly


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