Hello everyone. I'm a recent member of the forums, although I've scoured the archives many many times. Thanks to all of you for sharing your experiences here. It's heartwarming, in a way, to know that I'm not alone in having a psychologically abusive past.

I haven't attended church in well over ten years and have recently learned about the resignation letter. I'm planning on finally submitting mine later this week. I wanted to post my letter here and ask all of you if there's anything I'm missing or anything I should omit. My goal is to sound steadfast and convicted so I won't elicit a surprise visit. However, I don't want to sound like I'm picking a fight either, since, at least in my experience, that nearly guarantees a visit. So, here's my letter:

Member Records Division, LDS Church
50 E North Temple Rm 1372
SLC UT 84150-5310

To Whom It May Concern:

This letter is my formal resignation from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Please process my resignation immediately and remove my name from all church records in a similar fashion.

I understand that the church takes resignation very seriously, so please know that I have carefully considered this decision. I understand that, according to the church, resignation cancels the effects of my baptism, withdraws the priesthood from my person, and suspends whatever temple sealings and blessings I might have. As I do not believe the church has the spiritual authority to bestow these blessings and privileges, this has not been a difficult decision to make.

Please know that I am resigning from the LDS church due to my certainty that it is a man-made institution with absolutely no power of divinity. I do not believe the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is the one true church. I do not believe Joseph Smith was a living prophet. I do not believe the Book of Mormon is the word of God. Please do not send visitors from the church or missionaries to my residence. I will not receive them into my home; I will not speak with them. Again, I have carefully considered this decision and will not be dissuaded.

I expect written conformation of my resignation in a timely fashion. Please know that an identical copy of this letter has already been given to my attorney. Therefore, any attempt to contact me with the exception of written confirmation of my resignation may result in legal action.


Sincerely,

[My name]
Date of birth: [my date of birth]


Thanks for any feedback you might have! I've read that it may be important to notarize the letter. Is this true? If so, why? 'm bad about asking questions. It's probably one of the main reasons the Mormon thing didn't work out).

Looks great dbeddy10,
Go ahead an add some masterful Twain if you want. Maybe something like, "I recognize that my name remains on your records in error and would like to have this mistake immediately corrected!", even though it could easily be considered a waste of wit.

Congratulations

Make that a witty comment in appreciation of Charles Dickens instead.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/com ... _blog.html

“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to heaven, we were all going direct the other way — in short, the period was so far like the present period, that some of its noisiest authorities insisted on its being received, for good or for evil, in the superlative degree of comparison only.”

_________________
God of Poly-Folly Folly

{ If you believe in things that you don't understand, then you suffer ~ Stevie Wonder }
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God of Poly-Folly Folly

Thanks for the reply, joseph's myth. I like to think that I have a pretty good sense of humor, which didn't serve me well during my Mormon upbringing. Wittiness? Sarcasm? A Mormon craves not these things.

So, I think I'll keep the Dickens and Twain quotes out this time. Interestingly enough, we had a young guy in our tiny branch when I was growing up who was actually a PhD student in English. He gave me my very first copy of Dickens, which was actually A Tale of Two Cities. He was a smart guy (he believed in science and everything!) and I wondered how he continued to stay in the church. Me on the other hand, I got out but it took me years.

Just plain congratulations!

Your letter looks great. But it doesn't matter how nicely its written or what it covers, you've go to have "The Essentials" as they say in Priesthood class, and you do have those: "I quit!"

I think you'll find that sending in the letter is like unloading a wheelbarrow of spiritual sandbags off your head.
And once you get any kind of reply in return, you will realize that you really are an independent being,
not beholden to the church, and free to figure out on your own, what and how much to believe.

Thanks, Abinadi. I'm psyched to get Mormons, especially the missionaries out of my hair. I grew up on the east coast, in a small town far from the Mormon bastions of Utah and Idaho and Arizona. This worked in my favor in a number of ways (no seminary, for example, because I was the only kid in our church at the time). I took for granted that I wasn't constantly bombarded with missionaries and letters from bishops and counselors. But much later, I went to a state school out west. My parents gave the local bishop my information and the missionaries just hounded me endlessly. They showed up at school multiple times, and once one of my professors got out his phone and started dialing 911. They hightailed it out of there.

They also showed up at my door a few times a month, and I decided to keep a half empty bottle of vodka near the door so I could stumble and hold it while I told them to get lost. Of course, once one of the missionaries told me he would have me excommunicated for having alcohol in my apartment, to which I replied, "Really? Great! Get that ball rollin', my man." Then I took a long swig.

Unfortunately for me, he didn't call my bluff because everywhere I've moved, the missionaries eventually show up. Generally they're polite, but occasionally, I get a troll. This way, I'm hoping to get them out of my hair for good.

Hello dbeddy,

I was excommunicated about 40 years ago and I don't know what is actually required in your letter. I want to put in my 2 cents anyway.
>>>They also showed up at my door a few times a month, and I decided to keep a half empty bottle of vodka near the door so I could stumble and hold it while I told them to get lost. Of course, once one of the missionaries told me he would have me excommunicated for having alcohol in my apartment, to which I replied, "Really? Great! Get that ball rollin', my man." Then I took a long swig.<<<

The church promotes the viewpoint that people leave the church in order to commit sin. The above indicates that you have decided to be the poster child for this claim.

>>>Please know that I am resigning from the LDS church due to my certainty that it is a man-made institution with absolutely no power of divinity. I do not believe the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is the one true church. I do not believe Joseph Smith was a living prophet. I do not believe the Book of Mormon is the word of God. Please do not send visitors from the church or missionaries to my residence. I will not receive them into my home; I will not speak with them. Again, I have carefully considered this decision and will not be dissuaded. <<<

If you don't want anyone to respond to you other than accepting your resignation then you might not want to include all of your beliefs which the reader would naturally disagree with. If you want to get it all off your chest than then invite the next hometeacher in and let it all hang out.

Good thing Missionaries always get sent out in pairs! (it'samormonjoke)

_________________
God of Poly-Folly Folly

{ If you believe in things that you don't understand, then you suffer ~ Stevie Wonder }
.................. www.­tudou.­com/­programs/­view/­7Q0q-­Vv8sHQ/
.............. http://www.tudou.com/programs/view/7Q0q-Vv8sHQ/
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God of Poly-Folly Folly

Interestingly enough, I rarely if every drink. But in my previous experience with the missionaries, if they think you're living a "wholesome" lifestyle, they believe you're more apt to come back to the church. In my case, anyway, they thought all I needed was a little push. After all, I was already adhering to most of the rules that scared most people off. So having the vodka bottle around was the only way to actually get rid of them. Before that, I would ask them to leave over and over, and they just wouldn't. I had to make an excuse and claim I had to leave or I had to shut the door in their face, which I felt badly about. But showing them that I really wasn't LDS material was the only way to get them off my doorstep.

As for not putting all of my beliefs in the letter, believe me, I didn't. My thoughts on Joseph Smith alone might fill a dozen pages. As I stated in my original post, I want to sound certain without sounding like I'm picking a fight. My fear is that if I don't give enough information the reader of the letter will interpret that as unsure or recreant, which could mean I'm more likely to receive a visitor. I'm trying to hedge a middle ground here and sound confident without sounding completely pugnacious.

But if others agree with you, maybe I'll scale back my reasons for leaving the church.

First, I knew one Christian ExMo who deliberately chose to keep the WOW in order to be a more effective witness to Mormons. I, however, do not agree with that because there is a certain beauty in being able to show TBM's the freedom that they have surrendered to TSCC.

I found that by knowing all the deep dark secrets of Mormon history and being willing to share them, or knowing the problems in their theology and being willing to expose them to the home teachers, was a very effective means of having them respect my wishes to not be visited any longer.

Now it's been decades since I resigned and had any contact with mishies.

_________________
Tell my mother, tell my father
I've done the best I can
To make them realize this is my life
I hope they understand.
I'm not angry, I'm just saying
Sometimes goodbye is a second chance.
Shinedown, "Second Chance" The Sound of Madness

Hello wm law,

A third possible course is to find a code of ethics unrelated to Mormonism that you find of value and keep that instead. Preferably one in which all of the thinking hasn't already been done for you. I've personally found that the Mosaic law meets this criteria.

[/quote]

Hello wm law,

A third possible course is to find a code of ethics unrelated to Mormonism that you find of value and keep that instead. Preferably one in which all of the thinking hasn't already been done for you. I've personally found that the Mosaic law meets this criteria.[/quote]


I like this question. I don't know too many Ex-Mormons, but the few I do know seem intent upon finding a new code of ethics to follow. I suppose this is a byproduct of having all those lists of rules and commandments crammed down our throats for so long. We just feel more comfortable with a set of laws propping us up.

I tend to agree with sleepyhead regarding finding a set where "the thinking hasn't already been done for you." For example, I don't drink alcohol too regularly because it affects my sleep and gives me a hangover (rather than because it's inherently evil, or something). I do, on the other hand, drink coffee each and every day--religiously, you might say. So, I adhere to parts of the WoW, but not because I think it's an important set of rules to follow. Instead, I just don't like what alcohol and nicotine does to my body.

It's not particularly time effective, but I tend to ask myself a series of questions regarding decisions throughout the day. Is this decision likely to affect someone else negatively? Am I doing this only out of self preservation?